I guess I could live with my anger and frustration. Anger so huge it takes over you and makes you do stupid things that don’t make sense the following day. I always said that I would rather die than cringe in the face of cruelty and oppression. What happened to my wise saying that I shall live to fight another day?
I was once a sweet child you know, so full of humility. Where did it all go to? Now I am an angry adult, embittered by life. All I want to do is fight anything in my way. It is like clawing your way out of a bad dream. My voice shouts and screams in desperate rage. I am not going to be a victim. If you injure me I will find a way to pay you back. I will leave insults and curses at your door step so that they may torment you for what you have done to me.
An angry embittered adult clawing my way out of a bad dream. Life is bad when you feel unhappy. You have nothing to lose by dying then.
I think I am afraid of living my life in the shadow. That when I die I will be gone. Like the echo of a whisper and I won’t have made a difference to anyone whether I lived or not. No one ever heard my voice in protest because I was always in fear.
I want to know that even if the one with the power gets his way, they will keep away from me. I will have loosened my anger to terrorize them. I might look foolish, but I guess I could live with my anger and frustrations.